May 10, 2006

Over the Hill

I went to a new gyno yesterday on the recommendation of an excellent fellow Diarylander, and for the most part it went pretty well. The doc was very relaxed, laid-back, knowledgable � all the things you want in a doctor.

She prescribed me the NuvaRing, which I kind of saw coming, considering the NuvaRing posters decorating the office, the NuvaRing pen I was given to fill out my new patient form, the NuvaRing stirrup footrest cozies, etc. It kind of skeeves me out that you can pretty much guess which medication a doctor is going to prescribe you based on the advertisements in his or her waiting room, office, and exam room. This is what medicine seems to have come to, ladies and gentlemen.

The NuvaRing does seem to have its advantages, though. It has a relatively low dose of hormones, so it won�t make me crazy or nauseate me like some pills have; I won�t have to remember to take a pill every day; it will probably clear up my skin; it�s kind of freaky-looking, so I can chase my husband around the house with it to frighten him. I�ve checked out some discussion boards, and women seem to dig it. We�ll see.

So here�s the thing that majorly bothered me about this doctor:

I was asking her a question that started with, �So if my husband and I decide to have children��

And she looked at my chart, looked at me, and said, �If?? Pfft! You�re not getting any younger.�

Folks, I am 30 years old. I�ll be 31 this month.

I would maybe, maybe expect to hear this nonsense from a male gynocologist. In 1957.

What is the deal here? I know that the average child-bearing age in the U.S. is still 25, but overall birth rates among women 35 to 39 and those ages 40 to 44 are at the highest levels for these group in three decades. I thought having kids in your 30s wasn�t a big deal anymore. My sister is 40 years old, and she just had her fourth kid.

But why am I trying to justify being childless at 31? Until yesterday, I didn�t think of myself as particularly old, and I didn�t think my eggs were drying up or my insides were turning to dust. Was I supposed to be popping out kids left and right in my 20s, like the emotionally mature Britney Spears?

But I have to tell you, it�s kind of hard to argue about this stuff when you�re wearing a paper gown that opens in the front, and you�re sitting on a table with your legs spread open, and someone is wearing a miner�s hat to peer into your lady parts.

Now if you�ll excuse me, I have to go soak my teeth in Polident, and my walker could use some polish.

|

metanephros at 12:52 pm

previous | next